12​.​1​.​18

by Juniper Ginger

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04:46
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04:26

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recorded one chilly afternoon in the studio of Hannah E. Bevens -->
www.hausofhannah.com

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released December 1, 2018

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about

Juniper Ginger Portland, Maine

Juniper Ginger is the solo project of Portland, Maine songwriter Alex Millan. Her songs are mostly honest stories about the people and places she encounters. When heard live, sparse accompaniment invites listeners to get lost in the poetry. Juniper Ginger's debut album I Saw The Wreckage was released in November 2016. ... more

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Track Name: House In The Woods
you remind me of a house in the woods
where sun shines onto the concrete stoop
and neighbor kids laugh as we light up in your room
you remind me of that candle smell
laundry detergent, other things i cannot place
running from wasps with that look on your face

do you remember the winter that read like a novel?
it was just four weeks long when i count it out
whiskey slurped over the sink and my poor cotton mouth
do you remember when i drove her home?
carving ice off the sand smothered road
i make that same drive to work
but something's not working here now
cause i kept my mouth shut
when the substance got too thick to swallow

you remind me of who i was then:
somewhat lighter,
but i learned to fill myself in.
i painted the walls
i ran three miles a day
i drank your voice down
and still couldn't escape

throwing rocks at your windows
i guess i'm the foolish one now
maybe i'll pick my battles much better the next time around
Track Name: Bread Milk & Eggs
i'm not feeling any safer these days
since they handed us a western lie inside a global fate
i keep mine hidden in my coat
buried in a foot of snow
today, there's nowhere for my neighbor's truck to go

they say "a climate change is gonna come"
they say "just take that payout kid, and run, run, run,
we recommend you buy yourself a different life
leave the death, leave the danger all behind"

but all i buy is bread milk and eggs at the store
(not the one we can't go to anymore)

so many evenings spent staring down a stranger's face
for any meaning that could shake me from
this self-indulgent phase
still, i just took the compliments as they came
stacked them up against the silence of your gaze

see, everyone here has the same dreams
so everyone here does the same things
and everyone fear what they can't see
but all that i see is twice as terrifying
are you terrified yet?

all i buy is bread milk and eggs at the store
(not the one we can't go to anymore)
Track Name: Citybound
wake to face the truth of what i've done
take a slow breath and follow it through with another one
pull myself out of bed and fall back in for better or worse
time to face today's problems in yesterday's shirt

tina pours my drinks till i'm puffing out
getting taller with every one i throw down
pressing fists to my chest like i've got something figured out
drop you off at your place and drive myself around

for three days and nights with a fear i can't face
of a beautiful life in an imperfect space
i might be citybound, but i'll sure miss this place

in my dreams last night you met me in
the apartment where i learned you could not commit
so i tossed and i turned till i woke on the living room floor
i said don't you follow me here, you can't use me no more

so every night in the back of my car
i'm peeling the labels off and spilling the jars
keep that shit for yourself, i don't care where you are
Track Name: Harpswell
it's the end of the world as we know it
i still think high enough of me to call myself an artist
and all the people that we know
still drag their feet down city streets that never seem to show
all the cracks in the foundations
of the deals they've been making with themselves
saying "i'll try to be good"
but in this town, on this night, who really could?

we're smoking 27s right outside some shady bar
where the bouncer knows your name
and hasn't asked to see your card
since he recognized you from back in high school
when you were both from someplace else
but here you are

it's the end of my life as i've built it
back to harpswell, not too drunk to drive,
but just enough to prove that i am not the person you should want
the grace that you possess is something i can only dream of
so if you can promise to be good
i said if you can just promise to be good
if you can just promise to be good
i'll promise not to say those things that i rather would

we're smoking 27s on the walk back to your car
and i see you staring through me
but i'm standing right in front of you
i don't care who strikes first
i don't care who's got it worse
i'm still standing
(barely conscious, but i'm standing)
though the cracks in my foundations start to show
say, when it rains, will i have someplace to go?
Track Name: Your Thinking Face
i'm jolted from a bad dream
of newspapers and tv screens
the shadows paint my eyes shut
the sun illuminates the scene
i put on my jacket and my shoes
to keep my fury on the move

i'm setting fire to the cities in my mind
to spread the sentiment that they're not worth
my effort or my time
i'll canvass every neighborhood
divert the funds to war
whittle memories down to profits
and keep the winnings from the poor parts of my mind

don't let her slip away
because the future just won't wait
throw half my things away
i'm feeling richer all the same
she says, "you've got your thinking face put on,
tell me what's really going on"

i said there's cities burnt to ruins in my mind
a growing chasm where the future and
the things i've left behind
all get swallowed by the distance
so i'm never really sure if the faces i forgot
are worth the ones i've made room for in my mind

i fell into a dream
safe from noise and tv screens
for everything i've run from
i know i won't let this one get away from me

i've made a home from all the rubble in my mind
inside the foaming mouth of anger
done my best to be alright
and those i left behind i'll keep a little closer now
so when i look back, maybe i'll be proud
well i hope you're proud
Track Name: Sleep Now
line's down for now, the ocean sings
homebound but he's got a couple things
to make the day less loud
now sleep now, sleep, now

still dark as she ventures out alone
the shadows cast and write the dawn
no rules to wrap her pithy prose in skin

no sight but sky wrapped in orange glow
as the sea laps onto the shore
no sound but salt, so now she knows
he can't win

because there's no invisible hand to right the switch
there's no easy excuse for our loneliness
we give our friends the gift of what we'd do for ourselves
if we could only be somebody else
so sleep now, sleep, now

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